I know.

Salam. 

ALLAH loves me. And I always knows that.

He always gives HIS hints in different way.

I'm not that strong. Or as strong as i always wished for. But somehow, deep inside I said to myself; I need to be strong for others. At least that was what I thought of. I cried myself out sometimes. Yet, I always believe that things will be better one day. Crap happens. But that does happens in life. Things doesn't usually happens the way you planned for. And there you'll meet frustrations.

By telling others that giving up is not a must, everything is going to be okay; another way of telling myself that life's not that tough either. I always felt better if I can make other people's day better. It happens yesterday and today. An in this case, my lil brothers and sisters. No matter they are blood related or not. No matter from which community they are. So, how far could I run away from them if they are my strength without them noticing it? Starting today, no more deactivating efbi. *i hope* 

Sometimes when people look up on you, you know how frustrated you are, how bad you felt, you still must put up a smiling face. That's what I felt. Maybe not you, but more of me. hehe. People turn to you, seeking advices, supports, suggestions in facing their problems. The problems might differ. You might not face what they are facing. But somehow, they still says thanks. *Hoping that they will get through* 

Yet, there are times when, I, personally still need advices. STill want other people to tell me that things are going to be okay. Still need people to hear my stories. And ALHAMDULILLAH. I have them. Those i can turn to. *tiba tiba teringat lagu christina aguilera I turn to you* And there are times where, by telling others that everything is going to be fine, makes me believes in ALLAH even more. I don't need people to understand me. Cause people might not. *but I'm lucky if there are* And it might frustrates them when it happens. *it happens all the time* And I'm really so not into explaining when time gets rough. I only need people to accept me the way I am. Thanks for accepting me the way I am. xoxo

And Iyah is on her way back to Wisc. Not really sure what time she'll arrive. The house becomes as quiet as before she was back in Malaysia. 2 things I didn't manage to do with her. 1st, go ice skating. 2nd, teach her Calc. I'm a bad sister. *sigh* May things become better for her. Amin.

I have this one senior I always love to stalk look up to. Kind of admire. Senior in Dublin. Furthering studies I guess. *jealous* The senior gets to go overseas. I mean oversea oversea. And me? Just UK...M *sigh* Urm. Neways, all the best senior.

Suddenly everybody is flying. Sob sob. I wanna go fly also. Moneyyyyyy =P